Beyond the Ballot: Equipping Ourselves & Our Kids for the Road Ahead
Maneuvering this moment with renewed commitment
So here we are. It’s over a week after the elections and it’s an understatement to say that we’re concerned how the outcome will impact people who hold marginalized identities. We’re assuming that if you are reading a newsletter called “Raising Antiracist Kids” that you are, too (if you’re not, we’re super curious to hear what brought you here so reply to this email–let’s talk).
The results of November 5th mean that many communities on the margins are now in added danger and many are experiencing fear, panic and trauma.
If us adults are going through this tsunami of emotions, what about the little kiddos?
A 5th grader we know asked his parents if his Haitian friend would be deported because they heard that all Haitians will be deported under the new administration.
In the midst of a morning of cuddles over the weekend, our 5-year-old asked us why we couldn’t just ignore Trump.
An 8th grader we know, who is Black, received the horribly infamous text message that he was required to report to the plantation now that Trump has won.
Our first reaction is to say a string of expletives and scream into our pillows. AND if this is too much for us, we know we need to consider how our kids are taking it all in.
Even if you’ve kept your kids away from the rough parts of this election season, if they’re in school, they’re processing it with their friends. And we don’t know about you but we’d much rather be the ones to present them with the facts and help relieve any fears they might have. Other kids are awesome but they’re not the most reliable source of news.
Tabitha here:
So in the midst of feeling in danger and scared, I’m doing what I know how to do, which is to organize and to educate others while helping ground us. We didn’t get to this moment in history overnight. There are many factors that have contributed to this. In the last few days, many people have reached out to us asking for direction and support. Folks in this moment are struggling between choosing hope and giving in to despair. If there's one thing this election season has taught us it’s that, even if we’ve been organizing for years (decades), we still have an immense amount of work to do in building the community and the world we want for ourselves and our families.
We’ve heard a clear need for more factual resources from trusted voices for building a multiracial feminist future. We need each other. Not just now but always. And we’re here to build community with you. Because it’s the only way we’ll get through this.
Adam here:
As the dust settles after the election, people are looking at who to blame and how this could have happened. While the postmortem on the election can happen before future campaigns, we need to look at what we can do in the here and now. One thing is incredibly clear: a majority of white men voted to protect their own interests at the expense of others. We white men need to grapple with the ways in which whiteness, masculinity, and sexism impact how we show up in society.
Tabitha and Adam back together again:
We are sharing with you today some resources that we’ve found helpful both in educating ourselves about how we got here and grounding us in the work ahead. We’re sharing a short list because we want you to actually carve out the time to read, listen and watch with an eye on lessons that pertain to not just you but also your community. Now is not the time to read-like-scroll. If you’re not already doing this work within your community, this email is meant to be a door to further engagement and action. Come on in. Over the last week, we’ve witnessed some people crushed with hopelessness but we’ve seen more of us resolute and determined to not only fight with all we have but to also bring other people along with us.
The resources are grouped in 2:
Resources for adults-Our first Building Block of Antiracist Parenting is Continuous Education. That’s for us adults! Even if you don’t have kiddies in your life, it’s important to continuously be a student, keeping the learning consistent and rigorous. If it makes you uncomfortable, push into that feeling and keep going.
Resources for kids-We’ll share some books to read with kids about others fighting injustice in history, about being mindful in this moment and other tips to keep us focused on the big picture even when the immediate seems so dire.
So dive in!
ADULTS
Book
We Will Not Cancel Us by adrienne maree brown
Some are approaching the loss on November 5 by finger-pointing, criticizing and blaming. That may feel satisfying in the moment but systems of patriarchy, white supremacy and racism benefit from us being divided. They benefit from us making our tent smaller and raising the barriers to entry. Is the work of being in community with people who don’t always get it easy? Not in the least. But we’re committed to it and we found this book vital in learning how to address harm and healing in community with each other.
Digital Tool
We read A History of Racial Injustice from the Equal Justice Initiative *almost* every day (it comes daily, and we read them as our schedule allows). It’s an email tool that sends historical information about key moments in history as it pertains to racial injustice. It drops into your inbox daily and it has transformed our understanding of how prevalent, insidious and pervasive racial injustice is. To understand how we got here, as a country, we need to reckon with our history. Read about it and sign up here.
Videos
What is Structural Racism? -This is Racism 101. If you’re struggling to understand the structures of racism and how it manifests, watch this video. While economics seems to have been top of mind for some voters, we cannot ignore how race played a role in this election season. When candidates claim that equity initiatives are harmful to white people, and blame immigrants from Haiti and Central and South America for the economy, they have made their beliefs very clear. That is because race continues to play a role in everyday life all around the country and it’s about to get harder for many. Get grounded in the facts with this video.
Trevor Noah Breaks Down Reparations & White Privilege-An audience member asked Noah about the lived realities of white poor people and the relationship to that and reparations. This video is a few years old but still relevant.
Podcasts
If you parent children and/or are involved in education, these podcasts are crucial to understanding the relationship between systems, racism, education and opportunity. For the white folks among us, the education your kids, especially your boys, receive is a major part of how they view themselves and the world around them. As we saw in this election season, the mix of racism, toxic masculinity, fear and insecurity in young white men can have devastating impacts for everyone.
School Colors Podcast
Combatting Disinfo:
Tabitha here: Did you hear the story about the company that is withholding Christmas bonuses because they’re stocking up on products before the tariffs go into effect? I saw it from someone I respect on social media so naturally, I told Adam about it. A few minutes later, he looked it up.
It was not verifiable. And even though I consider myself to be a smartie pants, I fell for it.
Combatting disinfo in these times is key. Make snopes.com and politifact.com your friends. It takes a minute to look it up. This isn’t just for us adults. It can be helpful with stories our kids may be coming home with, as well.
KIDS
Videos
Books
Holding On To Community
Getting Inspiration To Take Action
Developing Mindfulness To Ground Ourselves
For When Kids Feel Overwhelmed By It All
What We’re Currently Reading:
We Grow The World Together, Parenting Toward Abolition
Tabitha here: I’m always striving to infuse principles of abolitionism into my parenting. I don’t always get it right. This new book is proving to be both a warm blanket of forgiveness to myself and a powerful mandate for us who parent and are aiming to build a different world, one where compassion, love and justice are core, defining pillars. Read with me and let me know what you think.
Stamped from the Beginning: The Definitive History of Racist Ideas in America
Adam here: Truth be told, I’ve been reading this off and on for over 3 years. Along with The 1619 Project and other books that really frame the history of race and racism in America, Ibram X. Kendi packs 736 pages with the horrors and realities of how we got where we are today. It is also available in a young adult version, but I like the ability to read a fact-filled page, look at the references and really process the history of how we got to where we are today.
That’s it from us for today. Try to do one thing this week that grounds you and infuses a touch of joy into your day. We’re in this together. Preserve and protect your energy because we’re in for a long fight, friend.
Tabitha & Adam