How To Talk To Kids About Breonna Taylor

Photo by LOGAN WEAVER | @LGNWVR on Unsplash

Hi there! Happy you're here. Let's get into it, shall we?

Today, four current and former police officers who were responsible for the murder of Breonna Taylor were federally charged. For some, this might feel like a step closer to justice after she was shot and killed in her home by police on March 13, 2020. For others, this feels like justice delayed. There is no justice within an unjust system that continues to devalue and degrade the lives of people whose communities have been historically and currently marginalized BUT I understand why today might be moving to some. No matter where you're landing on the events of today, it's important for all of us parents to talk to our kids about Breonna Taylor and here are some tips for doing just that.

I wrote about WHY to talk to white kids about Breonna Taylor in 2020 for Romper. You can read it here.

Here are 4 pointers for the HOW to talk to all kids about her.

1) Talk about Breonna's life. 
Kids can relate to joy. They can relate to dreams. They can relate to promise. You can share with them, as a starter, "Breonna Taylor was a young woman whose job was to help people. She had just bought a brand new car and was loving it. She was only 26 years old and her life was just beginning."

2) Talk to them honestly but according to their developmental level about what happened.
Kids can understand harm. They can understand being hurt for not doing anything. They can certainly understand fairness. Try to mediate any argument between two kids and you'll see how much your kids know about fairness. You can tell your kids, "Breonna Taylor was killed by police while she was in her home. It's not okay to hurt others." Keep it simple and to the point.

3) Talk to them about systems that are harmful.
We talk to our seven year old about policing as a system. Often, you'll hear folks try to make the distinction between "good" police and "bad" police. But policing as a system is harmful and everyone participating in upholding that system is complicit, at the very least. Policing doesn't deal with trauma and hurt and pain before it happens and it doesn't seek to stop it from happening in the first place. When we examine issues that plague our communities, like poverty and mental illness and systemic racism, showing up after the fact doesn't stop these issues from reoccurring. It doesn't address them at their core. Policing has also been shown to disproportionately target Black and Brown people. So talking to your kids about the system of policing can look like saying, "When we think about what keeps everyone safe, we also need to think about what keeps Black and Brown communities safe. Policing hurts Black and Brown communities. Let's think of some ways to keep everyone safe that don't include police."

4) Talk to them about what they can do.
Think of an activity you can do with them that helps them remember Breonna Taylor's life and seeks to make change regarding the type of systemic racism that killed her. Start locally by researching together organizations that work on reimagining safety in Black and Brown communities. Maybe do a joint art project together about Breonna's life and what happened to her that your kid can share with friends and family. Maybe together, you can do an art project to illustrate the 13 Guiding Principles of Black Lives Matter In Schools. Only you know what reaches your child best and what'll help the conversation land for them.

Whatever you do, commit to antiracist parenting as a practice in your family so that this conversation doesn't seem like it only bubbles up when the news dictates it. Too many Black and Brown people have been killed by not just police but by racist systems. Particularly if you're white, don't just wait for injustice to hit you on top the head before you teach your kids about it and help them become changemakers. 

FINDING MY JOY
Today was heavy. This month has been heavy. The past few years have been heavy. Take your joy where you can get it. Steal moments to smile, to laugh with your kids, to relish in the NOW.

This song by Nigerian artiste Burna Boy is what I've been moving my body to today. Don't forget to let joy exist within your body AND your mind. Help it find a home there. 

Okay, friends, that's it from me. Tell me how this is landing for you. Just reply to this email and it'll land in my inbox, okay?

Wishing you a relaxing rest of summer. 

xo
Tabitha