Part 3: Parenting Under Fascism-6 Rules For Staying S.T.R.O.N.G.
We won't just survive. We will thrive-for ourselves and our kids.
In Part 3 of our series on Parenting Under Fascism (read/listen to Part 1 and Part 2), we’re delving in a bit deeper into how us parents and caregivers can take care of ourselves during these times.
We’re in a period where the intention is to shock us into inaction. The people running this regime are trying to bully us into being overwhelmed, stressed out and exhausted.
What they’re underestimating, though, is that us parents and caregivers live our entire lives in a state of exhaustion simply because we are parenting through capitalism, racism, imperialist governments, etc and many of us manage to keep fighting for our children through it all.
But is this state of existence ideal for us, our children and our mental health? Not at all. So we’re learning how to manage through it in ways that can leave us feeling whole and cared for. The goal isn’t just to survive. It’s not to come out on the other end with our kids trailing behind us barely holding on.
We want to thrive.
Because that’s how we keep our joy-when we continue to center our children, the love we share, our compassion and our humanity.
A few weeks ago, our friend and seasoned organizer Justin Ruben, shared a powerful tool called 6 Rules For Defeating a Shock-And-Awe Strategy: Stay S.T.R.O.N.G. We read it. We read it again. And we’ve kept reading it over and over every time this fascist regime feels like too much. Many of you were unable to access the document when we shared it so, on a particularly long plane ride from California (during which Tabitha sat next to a woman who was reading Elon Musk’s mother’s book and kept gushing about what an amazing job she did with her kids. That’s a story for another time), she adapted the Google doc into the below easy-to-read guide.
As we mentioned, this was originally designed by Justin for organizers. Justin is also a parent and has decades of organizing experience so it’s very much applicable for us people who parent. We have found these groundings to be integral to our parenting practice not just now but for the foreseeable future.
For some of our kids, they’re living under a second Trump administration and that can be scary and tough to comprehend. For our kiddos, we particularly think about two points that are most relevant to parenting in this moment:
Momentum can change quickly.
We don’t actually know what’s going to happen (even if it feels like we do).
Don’t be afraid to have frank conversations with your older kids about how to thrive during these tumultuous times, and to balance optimism with reality. They need guidance and support in this moment, just as much as we do.
TO DO
Tabitha here: If you’re wondering what us organizers are up to right now, we’re organizing the Unite & Resist National Day of Action on International Women’s Day on March 8. There are over 200 events happening across the country. Find one (or host one!) and receive an incredible toolkit with ways to sustain action in your community. Show up, take up space, demonstrate the breadth of the resistance and let this regime know we’re only getting started.
TO READ
Adam here: For those of us with kids in schools, as much as possible, we need to work with our schools to ensure that they feel protected and emboldened to keep our kids and families safe. This article in Education Week shares how challenging it is to be in schools right now, and we know that this chaos is impacting teachers, administrators, and students.
That’s it from us for today. Next time, expect some 2025 kids books about identity, antiracism and belonging that we’re a wee bit obsessed with right now, some more guidance in this series on parenting under fascism from us and our friends and so much more.
Try to take a break from screens for even 10 mins today, okay? If your kids are cuddlers (ours totally are), relish that comforting time with them just a bit more. Hold on to connection. Take action. Find joy.
xo
Tabitha & Adam